On my way home from New York, I spent a long time selecting a book to read on the flight home. On a side note, I normally do not buy new books. I buy used books unless it’s an author I must support, and they are few and far in between. The only deviation from this practice is when I travel. For some reason, I allow myself to buy a new book to read. Mind you, sometimes I have to search high and low to find a book worthy of me. LOL. On another side note, what I should do is plan ahead and hit up Half Price Books before each trip and save some money.
Anyway, the book I ended up purchasing was about a girl who ended up being solicited to be a party girl at the parties of a prince of Brunei. She is my age, and, as I was reading, I was trying to figure out what I was doing when we were 18, 19, and 20. Before joining the harem (this is her word), she was a stripper and then an escort. She then joins this “court” and is a party girl/lover of the prince.
As I read about the expensive jewelry he gave her and the shopping sprees she went on, I realized I will never be “That Girl”. The book is called “Some Girls”. I’m not the type of woman who would be invited backstage at some concert. I am not the type of woman who would be invited to the VIP section of a club to join some famous athlete or musician.
This is not a slight on her lifestyle choices or me. It’s just an observation. I can’t imagine anyone stopping me on the street and offering the “opportunity” to me. At this point in my life, I know that a man will never whisk me off to some getaway and plow me with diamonds, rubies, pearls, clothes, etc. This is neither good nor bad. It just is what it is.
For me, there are some things that are sacred. They are not to be entered into lightly. Physical intimacy is one of those things. I was once told that sex was “just a thing” and I vehemently disagree with that statement. It is not just a thing and it something that doesn’t have a price because it is priceless. Again, this is to me. People can and do whatever they want. I am not the moral police, but I do wonder how lightly and easily people today take on more and more partners.
They say that everybody has a price. I was talking about the book to one of my bus buddies. I was marveling (and perhaps salivating) as I talked about the many, many gifts that were given to her. My bus buddy listened for awhile before telling me that everything has a price. Yes, she was getting money, gifts, and perks, but they came with a steep price. It’s like being married to a man who can give you everything and anything but is unfaithful to you. Is it worth the price, and is it only part of the game?
I would like to think my price is much higher, but it is easy for me to say what I wouldn’t do without having been offered the carrot.
I feel like I am not adequately saying what I am trying to get across, but the thoughts are bouncing in my head.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Monday, May 10, 2010
Random Musings
I had the strangest thought this Mother’s Day. I don’t remember every spending a Mother’s Day with my mom. I was 16 months old when my mom sent us away, so I know that I spent at least one with her. I don’t have memory of any other Mother’s Day I may have spent with her.
I also don’t remember spending any birthdays with her, but there were at least two. There was the birthday before we were sent away. I also have a picture of another birthday when I was little. I am sitting on her lap and smiling and my sisters are smiling standing next to her. There is a cake that says Happy Birthday, Mom. I was just too young to remember.
It did make me think that I should make a conscious effort to spend a birthday and Mother’s Day with her so I can have it in my memory bank.
I remember being very happy when I finally got a picture of me, my mom, and my dad together. I was 30+. Better late than never
I also don’t remember spending any birthdays with her, but there were at least two. There was the birthday before we were sent away. I also have a picture of another birthday when I was little. I am sitting on her lap and smiling and my sisters are smiling standing next to her. There is a cake that says Happy Birthday, Mom. I was just too young to remember.
It did make me think that I should make a conscious effort to spend a birthday and Mother’s Day with her so I can have it in my memory bank.
I remember being very happy when I finally got a picture of me, my mom, and my dad together. I was 30+. Better late than never
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Harlems Song Revisited
My imagination has always been extremely overactive. I have a rich inner life. This imagination is very useful as I plot out my book. If I had one complaint, it would be that early in the morning, the book becomes part of my dreams and I feel like I am actually experiencing what the lead character is experiencing.
In some ways, I want to hold the plot close to me like a secret recipe or security code. In other ways, I want to shout the plot off the roof tops. I suppose if I did jot it down, it would make it more real and tangible to me.
Basically, the lead character is a woman named Harlem. I picked the name because she is going through a rebirth or renaissance if you will. She’s at a crossroads in her life. It’s a name I have always used.
The male lead has always been a character named Damian. As I was writing about them, another male character entered quite on his own. I wanted to name him Gregory, which is actually the name of a person I know. But then, the name Gabriel kept slipping out.
Well, to back up, I did not want to write about a relationship. The theme is played. I wasn’t quite sure if I even wanted to write a fiction novel. However, I am learning it’s not always what I want. In fact, the book just began pouring out of me two weeks ago.
I was musing with God on my plans vs. His plans, when it me. Damian as an agent of Satan, and Gabriel as an agent of God. So in these men you see the struggle Harlem actually has with her relationship with God. It’s quite evidence in the way the two men treat Harlem. One, with unconditional love and acceptance. The other with borderline abuse. And of course, Damian is the one Harlem is most drawn to despite the fact that he has her on a very unhealthy, emotional rollercoaster! Stay tuned!
I think it will actually be a short story. Like I said in the previous post, I want to publish an anthology of short stories from members of my church.
In some ways, I want to hold the plot close to me like a secret recipe or security code. In other ways, I want to shout the plot off the roof tops. I suppose if I did jot it down, it would make it more real and tangible to me.
Basically, the lead character is a woman named Harlem. I picked the name because she is going through a rebirth or renaissance if you will. She’s at a crossroads in her life. It’s a name I have always used.
The male lead has always been a character named Damian. As I was writing about them, another male character entered quite on his own. I wanted to name him Gregory, which is actually the name of a person I know. But then, the name Gabriel kept slipping out.
Well, to back up, I did not want to write about a relationship. The theme is played. I wasn’t quite sure if I even wanted to write a fiction novel. However, I am learning it’s not always what I want. In fact, the book just began pouring out of me two weeks ago.
I was musing with God on my plans vs. His plans, when it me. Damian as an agent of Satan, and Gabriel as an agent of God. So in these men you see the struggle Harlem actually has with her relationship with God. It’s quite evidence in the way the two men treat Harlem. One, with unconditional love and acceptance. The other with borderline abuse. And of course, Damian is the one Harlem is most drawn to despite the fact that he has her on a very unhealthy, emotional rollercoaster! Stay tuned!
I think it will actually be a short story. Like I said in the previous post, I want to publish an anthology of short stories from members of my church.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
It's All Coming Together
Yes, it has been a while. I did not make my weekly quota in April.
I have been writing a book idea in a journal. I will say more I as I began typing out that thoughts, but so far. I like it a lot. I will be sitting here and all these great ideas just pour out!
My goal is to start a writing group at my church. I would like us to meet once a month and share our progress. Eventually, I would like us to self-publish an anthology of short stories. I would also like for us to publish an anthology of poetry. We have so many writers at my church, and I believe we are all together for a reason!
I have some short trips coming up. I’ll be in a wedding in L.A. followed by a business trip to NYC.
I need to start planning my vacation. I don’t feel like planning this year so I am searching for a tour. I did find a tour that sounded interest that was Greece, Egypt and Israel. I would like to add in Turkey but it depends on time and money.
I’m still plotting to win the mega millions. LOL.
I have been writing a book idea in a journal. I will say more I as I began typing out that thoughts, but so far. I like it a lot. I will be sitting here and all these great ideas just pour out!
My goal is to start a writing group at my church. I would like us to meet once a month and share our progress. Eventually, I would like us to self-publish an anthology of short stories. I would also like for us to publish an anthology of poetry. We have so many writers at my church, and I believe we are all together for a reason!
I have some short trips coming up. I’ll be in a wedding in L.A. followed by a business trip to NYC.
I need to start planning my vacation. I don’t feel like planning this year so I am searching for a tour. I did find a tour that sounded interest that was Greece, Egypt and Israel. I would like to add in Turkey but it depends on time and money.
I’m still plotting to win the mega millions. LOL.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
Sweet Sade
Yesterday, I spent most of the day with my cousin and her daughter.
Sade makes me feel so wonderful. When I walk in, her face lights up and she starts laughing and jumping and reaching for me. It’s nice that someone is so happy to see me coming. LOL. She will be one year in less than a month. It’s so hard to believe. She is a miracle in my life and an opportunity for me to think of someone beyond myself.
We have a lot of plans for her life. There were a lot of things that we weren’t able to do and things that we weren’t exposed to that we want her to have and know. LaQuita and I talk about this all the time. This little girl will know that she is wanted and that she is loved. She will know that her family wants and expects her to succeed. She will know that home and family are safe places for her to be.
She may end of being a little spoiled and that’s okay. Part of our job is to instill the need to give back to her community. She will be able to look around and see that she is blessed, and she will see us sacrifice not only for her good but for the good of the community.
Sade makes me feel so wonderful. When I walk in, her face lights up and she starts laughing and jumping and reaching for me. It’s nice that someone is so happy to see me coming. LOL. She will be one year in less than a month. It’s so hard to believe. She is a miracle in my life and an opportunity for me to think of someone beyond myself.
We have a lot of plans for her life. There were a lot of things that we weren’t able to do and things that we weren’t exposed to that we want her to have and know. LaQuita and I talk about this all the time. This little girl will know that she is wanted and that she is loved. She will know that her family wants and expects her to succeed. She will know that home and family are safe places for her to be.
She may end of being a little spoiled and that’s okay. Part of our job is to instill the need to give back to her community. She will be able to look around and see that she is blessed, and she will see us sacrifice not only for her good but for the good of the community.
Poem
We are nearing the end of the month, and I have been embarrassingly negligent on my blog!
It’s not that I don’t have things to say. LOL! I’ve sat down a few times, but I just haven’t been able to quite get out what I want to say. There are times when the words on the page aren’t quite expressing what it is I am trying to say.
Last week during praise and worship a song/poem did come to me. Here it is:
Worthy, worthy, worthy
Is the Lamb that was slain
You are the reason
Why He came
He came to give you life
Life more abundantly
He came that you might have
Everlasting peace
He came to give you
Everything you will ever need
Come let us exalt
Our everlasting King
Jesus, Jesus
Is the Lamb that was slain
You are the reason
Why He came
It’s still a work in progress. I want to call it Jesus, Jesus Lamb of Glory, which is notably absence from the lines!
The last time I wrote a poem was years ago when I was in Charleston for a conference. Ah, the sweet smell in the air was inspiring.
It’s not that I don’t have things to say. LOL! I’ve sat down a few times, but I just haven’t been able to quite get out what I want to say. There are times when the words on the page aren’t quite expressing what it is I am trying to say.
Last week during praise and worship a song/poem did come to me. Here it is:
Worthy, worthy, worthy
Is the Lamb that was slain
You are the reason
Why He came
He came to give you life
Life more abundantly
He came that you might have
Everlasting peace
He came to give you
Everything you will ever need
Come let us exalt
Our everlasting King
Jesus, Jesus
Is the Lamb that was slain
You are the reason
Why He came
It’s still a work in progress. I want to call it Jesus, Jesus Lamb of Glory, which is notably absence from the lines!
The last time I wrote a poem was years ago when I was in Charleston for a conference. Ah, the sweet smell in the air was inspiring.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Church Article
This is the article from the April 1 newsletter of my church:
In a prayer, Saint Francis of Assisi asked God to make him an instrument of peace. He desired to sow love where there was hate, pardon where there was injury, faith where there was doubt, hope where there was despair, light where there was darkness, and joy where there was sadness.
Ezekiel 16:6 reads, “And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.” Despite God washing and caring for His people, they played the harlot. Even still, God remembered His covenant.
God kept His promise to Israel. Each time His people sinned, God was faithful and just to forgive them and keep His covenant. This covenant was sealed when Jesus Christ died on the Cross to pay for our sins and give us life. Because of Christ, no one is beyond repentance or forgiveness. No sin is too great that the Blood cannot cover it.
Before Jesus died on the Cross, He uttered the words, “It is finished.” Christ completed His purpose, and His death gave us life. When Christ died on the Cross, He died for our sins, our hurts, our pains, and any and everything else that attempts to hinder us. Christ replaced our death with life. He replaced our sin with redemption. He replaced our hurt and pain with healing.
Even if we stand polluted in our own sins, God is so faithful to forgive us. Even when we deserved the punishment of death, God’s grace and mercy pardoned us. It is in this demonstration of the awesomeness of God’s love for us that we can begin to become instruments of His peace.
Christ died that we could be light shining in the darkness. Christ died that we could be hope in the midst of despair. Christ died that we could be love in a world full of hate. Christ played His role, now we must play ours. Through Christ in us, we can sow and manifest the fruit of the Spirit.
Even in our darkest hour, deepest valley, and personal crisis, we can be comforted with the knowledge that our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, is with us. In Psalm 40, David said he waited patiently for God, and God heard his cry. David wrote of the Lord bringing him out of a horrible pit and out of the miry clay and placing his feet on solid rock and establishing his goings.
As we die out to ourselves, we are transformed into the likeliness of Jesus Christ, who came that we could live.
In a prayer, Saint Francis of Assisi asked God to make him an instrument of peace. He desired to sow love where there was hate, pardon where there was injury, faith where there was doubt, hope where there was despair, light where there was darkness, and joy where there was sadness.
Ezekiel 16:6 reads, “And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.” Despite God washing and caring for His people, they played the harlot. Even still, God remembered His covenant.
God kept His promise to Israel. Each time His people sinned, God was faithful and just to forgive them and keep His covenant. This covenant was sealed when Jesus Christ died on the Cross to pay for our sins and give us life. Because of Christ, no one is beyond repentance or forgiveness. No sin is too great that the Blood cannot cover it.
Before Jesus died on the Cross, He uttered the words, “It is finished.” Christ completed His purpose, and His death gave us life. When Christ died on the Cross, He died for our sins, our hurts, our pains, and any and everything else that attempts to hinder us. Christ replaced our death with life. He replaced our sin with redemption. He replaced our hurt and pain with healing.
Even if we stand polluted in our own sins, God is so faithful to forgive us. Even when we deserved the punishment of death, God’s grace and mercy pardoned us. It is in this demonstration of the awesomeness of God’s love for us that we can begin to become instruments of His peace.
Christ died that we could be light shining in the darkness. Christ died that we could be hope in the midst of despair. Christ died that we could be love in a world full of hate. Christ played His role, now we must play ours. Through Christ in us, we can sow and manifest the fruit of the Spirit.
Even in our darkest hour, deepest valley, and personal crisis, we can be comforted with the knowledge that our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, is with us. In Psalm 40, David said he waited patiently for God, and God heard his cry. David wrote of the Lord bringing him out of a horrible pit and out of the miry clay and placing his feet on solid rock and establishing his goings.
As we die out to ourselves, we are transformed into the likeliness of Jesus Christ, who came that we could live.
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