Matthew 11:12 reads, “And from the days of John the Baptist until now the kingdom of heaven suffereth violence, and the violent take it by force.”
This is one of my favorite scriptures, and my pastor used it in his sermon yesterday. It seemed appropriate to use it as my devotional today.
Since I am home, I was able to do a study on the scripture. Apparently, there are three different common views of what this scripture means. I will focus on the view that relates to me, right now.
According to the study text in my Bible, “…entering God’s Kingdom takes courage, unwavering faith, determination and endurance…” Contextually, there was growing opposition to the followers of Christ.
1 Peter 5:8 tells us, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.”
Lately, the fight has been out of me, and I haven’t felt like fighting. The problem with that is that I have been in a spiritual battle since I entered into the Kingdom of Heaven. There is a war coming at me regardless of whether I engage in battle or not. So, I must fight the good fight of faith. The alternative is to sit here and die, and that is not an alternative.
My prayers have continued to be a bit muddled. The good thing about being a writer is that I can’t ever deny what I am feeling. The bad thing about being a writer is that I can’t ever deny what I am feeling. It comes out. My dreams, well, they also tell the story. So, alas, I find comfort if the fact that some issues I can only hand over to God in prayer. I can’t change anyone other than myself, and that is what I need to work on.
This has actual been a great weekend. I took Friday off so I have had a four-day weekend, which is quickly coming to a close. I will also look forward to PTO-driven, four-day weekends the Fourth of July and Labor Day.
Also, yesterday was my pastor and his wife’s 40th wedding anniversary! They are such an amazing example of a solid, stable marriage. So, happy anniversary to them!
Monday, May 30, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Week 21
The women’s group at my church had a special service this past Friday. The theme of the service was “Amber Alert.” Part of the service was writing down what you wanted to give over to God. So, I wrote some things down, and I went to the altar for prayer.
One thing that struck me was that the speaker told me I was an “influencer.” This made me chuckle in my spirit because that is not a word I would use to describe myself. But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized this actually may be true. I realize that God has given us light that is supposed to reach the darkest of places. When my light is on, it shines very brightly.
I’ve been realizing this week I need to begin meditating on who God tells me I am. Not who I tell myself I am. Not who anyone else tells me I am. I need to know who God tells me I am and walk in that.
Because of that, I choose Matthew 5:14-16 for my devotional. It reads, “Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.”
I need to do a better job of keeping my light shining even when I don’t feel like it. Whatever that means.
One thing that struck me was that the speaker told me I was an “influencer.” This made me chuckle in my spirit because that is not a word I would use to describe myself. But, the more I thought about it, the more I realized this actually may be true. I realize that God has given us light that is supposed to reach the darkest of places. When my light is on, it shines very brightly.
I’ve been realizing this week I need to begin meditating on who God tells me I am. Not who I tell myself I am. Not who anyone else tells me I am. I need to know who God tells me I am and walk in that.
Because of that, I choose Matthew 5:14-16 for my devotional. It reads, “Ye are the light of the world. A city that is set on an hill cannot be hid. Neither do men light a candle, and put it under a bushel, but on a candlestick; and it giveth light unto all that are in the house. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.”
I need to do a better job of keeping my light shining even when I don’t feel like it. Whatever that means.
Monday, May 16, 2011
Week 20
I received a voicemail from my mom yesterday letting me know that my dad’s mom had passed away. Of course, this makes her my grandmother. The thing is that I didn’t really know her. I met her when I was an adult once, maybe twice. We exchanged a few letters, but that was about it. If you add the time I saw here and the time I spent reading and writing letters from/to her, it probably wouldn’t add up to 24 hours.
It did get me thinking about my sister, my cousin, and my aunt. These are the people closest to me who have died. My aunt raised me since I was 16-months old, so it was more like losing my mom. My cousin was raised as my sibling so it was more like losing a brother.
I was very sad this morning thinking about this. Honey was 25. Brett was 18 or 19. My aunt was 62. These are young ages (even my aunt’s 62). The anniversary of my aunt’s death is in a few weeks and on my mind. Life is so short. Too short to waste, and too short to waste on people who in the end don’t matter.
This caused me to use Job 1:21 as my devotional. It reads, “And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.”
Thinking on this scripture led me to think about my own mortality, which led me to Job 7:1. It reads, “Is there not an appointed time to man upon earth? are not his days also like the days of an hireling?”
Time. I have no idea of how much time I have left. This scares me sometimes. I think of all that I want to do. I think of the words that have been spoken over my life. When will this come? I quite accidently stumbled across Habakkuk 2:3. It reads, “For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.”
While I have not done any contextual study of this word, it does lead me to believe that God hasn’t forgotten His desire of me. God will, despite my own shortcomings, bring me to a place where I can achieve what He desires of me. I have some idea of what this is. There is an appointed time, and it will come to pass!
It did get me thinking about my sister, my cousin, and my aunt. These are the people closest to me who have died. My aunt raised me since I was 16-months old, so it was more like losing my mom. My cousin was raised as my sibling so it was more like losing a brother.
I was very sad this morning thinking about this. Honey was 25. Brett was 18 or 19. My aunt was 62. These are young ages (even my aunt’s 62). The anniversary of my aunt’s death is in a few weeks and on my mind. Life is so short. Too short to waste, and too short to waste on people who in the end don’t matter.
This caused me to use Job 1:21 as my devotional. It reads, “And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.”
Thinking on this scripture led me to think about my own mortality, which led me to Job 7:1. It reads, “Is there not an appointed time to man upon earth? are not his days also like the days of an hireling?”
Time. I have no idea of how much time I have left. This scares me sometimes. I think of all that I want to do. I think of the words that have been spoken over my life. When will this come? I quite accidently stumbled across Habakkuk 2:3. It reads, “For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.”
While I have not done any contextual study of this word, it does lead me to believe that God hasn’t forgotten His desire of me. God will, despite my own shortcomings, bring me to a place where I can achieve what He desires of me. I have some idea of what this is. There is an appointed time, and it will come to pass!
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Week 19
I am behind in posting my thoughts from my devotional day on Monday.
For the most, I am coming out of the funk I have had for several weeks.
Part of the problem is that I am in the midst of transition. I am not quite the person I am becoming, yet I am not quite the person I used to be. This is causing some friction internally. I feel like there is a battle going on between two people. One person is fighting to emerge. The other person is hesitant to change.
For my scriptures, I choose two of my favorite scriptures that tell me a few things about myself.
The scriptures let me know that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Even if I feel too this or too that, God made me in His image.
The other thing that gives me hope is that God knew me, knows me, and will know me. All of my transformations and renewing are already done. I just need to reach the moments in time when things click. I will never be done transforming, which is a good thing. There is always room for improvement.
Psalm 139:14
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
Jeremiah 1:5
Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.
My prayers surround my desire to not get frustrated and quit. It’s so easy to revert back to what is comfortable, but it’s time for the new wine skin the Bible talks about.
For the most, I am coming out of the funk I have had for several weeks.
Part of the problem is that I am in the midst of transition. I am not quite the person I am becoming, yet I am not quite the person I used to be. This is causing some friction internally. I feel like there is a battle going on between two people. One person is fighting to emerge. The other person is hesitant to change.
For my scriptures, I choose two of my favorite scriptures that tell me a few things about myself.
The scriptures let me know that we are fearfully and wonderfully made. Even if I feel too this or too that, God made me in His image.
The other thing that gives me hope is that God knew me, knows me, and will know me. All of my transformations and renewing are already done. I just need to reach the moments in time when things click. I will never be done transforming, which is a good thing. There is always room for improvement.
Psalm 139:14
I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.
Jeremiah 1:5
Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.
My prayers surround my desire to not get frustrated and quit. It’s so easy to revert back to what is comfortable, but it’s time for the new wine skin the Bible talks about.
Monday, May 2, 2011
Week 18
I am currently wondering about two different things about humanity. By this age, I am aware that a lot of my struggles, issues, and shortcomings aren’t unique to me. Many people have, are, or will struggled with some of the thorns that are on my side.
I wonder why it’s so hard for us to forgive ourselves. We are quick to forgive other people, but why is it so hard to forgive ourselves for the mistakes we make?
I wonder why we replay situations and scenes from the day over and over again and torment ourselves with regret. We analysis and analysis and analysis situations, but why? These are things that won’t matter next week, month, or year.
Why then is it so hard to quiet the voices? Why is it so hard to silence our inner critic? Why are we are own worst enemy?
Today, I need help in forgiving myself. I need help in not replaying a situation that I can’t go back in time and change. I need help silencing my inner critic.
I haven’t found the “right” scripture on forgiving ourselves. I’m not talking about forgiving myself of any “sin” but rather forgiving myself for making a mistake. For example, I did a report at work, and I made a mistake in it. Now, my inner critic is beating me up.
Here are some scriptures I used for my devotional:
Isaiah 52:2, "Shake thyself from the dust; arise, and sit down, O Jerusalem: loose thyself from the bands of thy neck, O captive daughter of Zion."
Romans 8:1-2, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death." (NIV)
Galatians 5:1, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." (NIV)
I wonder why it’s so hard for us to forgive ourselves. We are quick to forgive other people, but why is it so hard to forgive ourselves for the mistakes we make?
I wonder why we replay situations and scenes from the day over and over again and torment ourselves with regret. We analysis and analysis and analysis situations, but why? These are things that won’t matter next week, month, or year.
Why then is it so hard to quiet the voices? Why is it so hard to silence our inner critic? Why are we are own worst enemy?
Today, I need help in forgiving myself. I need help in not replaying a situation that I can’t go back in time and change. I need help silencing my inner critic.
I haven’t found the “right” scripture on forgiving ourselves. I’m not talking about forgiving myself of any “sin” but rather forgiving myself for making a mistake. For example, I did a report at work, and I made a mistake in it. Now, my inner critic is beating me up.
Here are some scriptures I used for my devotional:
Isaiah 52:2, "Shake thyself from the dust; arise, and sit down, O Jerusalem: loose thyself from the bands of thy neck, O captive daughter of Zion."
Romans 8:1-2, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death." (NIV)
Galatians 5:1, "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." (NIV)
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