I began observing Lent a few years back. Lent is a 40-day journey that begins on Ash Wednesday and concludes on Easter. Sundays are not included in the 40-day count. For me, practicing Lent began after a friend asked me to walk with her as she recognized the season. As part of the observance, we agreed to “sacrifice” meat. During my first few Lenten journeys, I gave up all meat. I determined I would include Sundays during my fast. Last year, I did not watch television. At first, it was painful, but I ended up getting a lot done. I was able to read, organize, and complete projects I had been putting off.
I consider Lent a time for me to sacrifice something to God for the gift and sacrifice He gave me. Lent is meant to be a season of soul-searching and repentance. It is a season for reflection and taking stock of your walk with God. It is a time I am very aware of my own unworthiness. I realize that nothing I can say or do can compare to the Cross. There are no works I can achieve to begin to deserve the sacrifice made for my sins, pains, and hurts.
This year, I have been trying to determine what I hold most dear. I have been trying to determine what the item I do not want to sacrifice is. In short, I am trying to determine what I am trying to hold on to that should be let go of. Last week, I recognized who I turn to when I am in extreme distress. I begin by praying. I then write in my journal to sort out what happened and my feelings behind what happened. Interestingly enough, when extremely distressed, I also immediately want to chat with an old friend of mine.
It is a reality that has been in the back of my head. But for the first time, I really recognized that I call him because talking to him soothes me. Without realizing it, he became part of my coping mechanism to stress. When in fact, the only conversation I need to have about anything is with God, and He will work it out.
What am I trying to seek during this season of repentance and self-reflection as Lent prepares me for Holy Week? I seek and invite God to reveal to me the areas I need to change. God will reveal to me what needs to change. It is in my relationships with trusted friends and mentors this can take shape. However, this can be a slippery slope. Often times, man tries to create you into his image. I reject this. I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I invite God to make me in His image.
God is trying to mature us and develop our characters. I invite you to join me in a time of honest and true self-reflection.
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